The Ghoulish Plot: a writer (because the story was written by Stephen King) returns to his home in Maine (again, Stephen King) at the same time that an ancient vampire has arrived to set up shop in the same creepy old house the writer remembers being old and creepy when he was a kid.

Well, you know how vampires are – soon enough they’re eating people and turning them into the walking undead who crave human blood and end up floating around outside people’s houses at all hours of the night. As the town succumbs to this terrifying creature, the writer and a small band of friends tries to stop them from destroying everything and everybody they’ve ever loved.

This book was turned into a TV miniseries in the 80s and that is now available as a 3-hour movie, but it’s also wooden and slow so this version was made with the idea of taking out most of the character development and sense of dread and foreboding and just make it a fast-paced kick-ass vampire flick with some funny quips mixed in. It was also apparently shot a couple years ago and held back to be dumped onto streaming close to Halloween for a sugary-sweet harmless flick that you will start forgetting minutes after you’re done watching it.

The Scariest Part of the Movie: there’s a moment where one of the main group who had been turned into a vampire is staked to the heart and falls and one lone tear falls down their face, and in that brief moment you see the regret as they accept their fate. A brief glimpse into a deeper beating heart in a movie that has almost none to begin with.

Spookiness Factor: it’s a Stephen King story about vampires in a creepy little town, but this feels mostly like a Marvel movie.

Rating: 4 out of 10 Tropical Nerds